I sense a blog transitioning in my future.  Polly is powering down on this talking about herself business. It turns out that: 1) law school teaches her more than just legal things; 2) her time does fly when her hands are full; 3) only Polly thinks mixed metaphors like #2 are swell; 3) “it’s” not actually about me; and 4) of late – the thing I like most about this blog are the husband’s piccies (I have no ego, here, folks – feel free to secretly agree).

So, let’s wean ourselves out of lengthy Polly diatribes while retaining some Polly-self-absorbtion for a scrolling-oriented minute: take this, pictures that I have been harboring for eons……

avopollylooza

Polly had a fear of eating fat believing it meant BEING fat but it ain’t necessarily so (she did some research – involving actual medical journal publications and everything**). Consequently, Pol got past her stubborn claims of “it tastes squashy and stuff,” admitted it was a fear-of-being-fat issue, and started inhaling those salt-covered wonder-kins with abandon.

shefoldifys

You too could have a Polly on your desk. makeapollyfoldified  The lovely (and from Poland) Foldify team gave me permission to post this do-it-yourself cut out. And who wouldn’t want one of those, eh? It is crafty. (most people, Polly. Your Mum and Dad might; probably not your bro, though).

pollypunzel

Polly’s hair grows, apparently.

kidneypunch

Pol’s favourite at-home DVD cardio thing involves practicing kidney punches.

A necessary skill?

scoopingunderconstruction

Polly slowly realizes that talking about herself is not everything – her blog begins to transform. Slowly. Rarely. Under construction, let’s call it.

Meanwhile, Polly plans on doing more of this:

meditationloos

*I shall credit the writer of a super and recent movie for this one – Silver Linings Playbook. I liked it a lot; hubby and I have taken to talking about Raisin Bran ever since (even if we don’t actually eat the stuff).

**Fancy spending some of your own time noodling around some Government-funded medical research? How’s about starting here: US National Library of Medicine, National Institutes of Health

Back (not that) soon, probably. I welcome comments as always: shescoops-at-gmail-dot-com…

http://mycardboardlife.com/3790

Polly’s love of chips (tortilla not British) is renowned (in her own mind). Sadly, inhaling them does not always mesh well with her little bodily system… She decided to cease and desist….

iwishicouldquityou

No, silly! No ceasing and desisting from enjoying life’s wonders (for me that includes salty-crunchy things to eat). Just not every day (let’s call it ‘sporadically’); with some mindful acceptance (I like to get chip-faced sometimes and that’s OK); and compromise (“bean and rice” chips? Tasty yet corn-free? Say what, now?).

Beanfields – The Website*

In the interests of ‘if you are going to do something; do it properly’ I don’t just grab a bag of the shelf and inhale. Oh No. It’s a multi-pronged endeavour: 1) gimme a bag (or 2) of Beanfields Sea Salt mixed with a bag of Beanfields Unsalted; 2) top those puppies with some iodized salt (is that ironic?); 3) shove ‘em in the oven ’till they are all warm and lovely; and 4) sit Polly down on the sofa to crunch loudly and force her understanding husband to turn the sound up on the tele.

Yum-Ski.

No they are not paying me for this: I am happy to be an outspoken advocate of the family-owned, corn-alternative, high-fibre, gluten-free, non-gmo, triangle-snack makers of the United States of America. Thanks for existing Beanfields (and for your cool and trendy-looking chip-bags).

Yes, this actually does sum up a lot of what I have been doing since the last post.

Teaser: what do avocados, foldify, and Rapunzel have in common? Hopefully my next few blog posts (we won’t hold our collective breath, Polly. My readers are so wise…).

1. Fall finals/midterms went. Not overly stressed out. Just did what I could do. Seriously. Not allowing the stress-brain-hamster-wheel-of-thought-streams to (overly) whirr worked well.
2. Had a jolly holiday in (climate-changed rainy?) England. The rain came down. And then more. And then more. I remember when the nature of British weather provided consistent breaks in showers (allowing me to dash car-wards or into Tescos without drenching). Not this last December.
3. Health-wise. Pretty good, not complaining still amenorrhagic but believe 2013 WILL be the year. (TMI? Nah. And what a phenomenal word, eh. Is that actually a word?)
4. Finally on the New Year Resolution front (I am a sucker for such things)…..

Hows about ‘being present’? Yes. I struggle there (you whirring brain-hamster-wheel-of-thought-streams, power-down).

no silly. not ‘be a present’

zombiepolly (yes we have been watching thewalkingdead)

If you are heading into an exam week, good luck to you my friends. You can do it! You can only do what you can do, right.

I was done for this batch of midterms as of Thursday night at 9:10pm. To best capture how I felt the morning after that exam before, here is what I emailed to my Dad on Friday. See, I talk to my loved ones in the third person too.

Daddy!!!

Hi!

Yup indeed. It’s all over for another chunk (until the end of April) and it feels good. The last exam was, dare I say, (too?) straightforward and I finished early. I also finished early on Tuesday which means that either: 1) I am super awesome; or 2) I missed something SIGNIFICANT. Obviously, Positive Polly is sticking with the former.

Thus. Me feeling pretty super this am. I was awake at…. wait for it…. THREE AM. But that’s OK. I woke up and reveled in being done and on a holiday (albeit with another three days of work). I also got excited because I have nothing to do this weekend. Not true. Planning Polly has plans. A massage (how extravagant), watching the rest of the “Silk” DVD you guys got me (I LOVE that show, the main lady is super-awesome) and eating some corn-free, bean-rice tortilla chips hot from the oven (I will bring you some to try – they will be cold by then, though).

It’s now 5:06am. I have kick-boxed. As you do. And the kettle just boiled. I have already got back into drinking multiple cups of Tetley every day (the ‘soya’ variety) in anticipation of my homeland culture. Oh the sacrifice.

Bring on the British chunky grilled bacon from the butcher, some egg white scrambles with spinach and maybe a butcher-sourced-sausage or five.

I am so impressed with my own ability to write at 5:06 (now 5:10am), I think I will go post this email on my blog too since it sums up the last week and my present state of being in not-that-brief fashion.

Love you Dad.
See you later? Try mum’s Skype.
Pol

I know, write the old Polly a letter and don’t apologize for its length (chapters, people, take it in chapters)….

timescoop

Dear Polly of November 2011,

Power down on the anxiety. You are at a 10 when you need to be at a healthy 2. A year from now, as you face your next batch of exams on brand new subjects, you will be rather calm. You will have spent ten months or so focusing on eliminating amorphous ‘stress’ from your world. And you will make great strides because many of the reasons for that stress are silly (silly = fear-based; not reality-based). So, put these things in your noggin and muse on them if you want:

1. Guess what I have done over the past two weekends? TWELVE PRACTICE EXAMS. Grrrr. Don’t be annoyed with me for doing them because now you feel like you have to do them. Don’t worry. You will only have taken one at-home practice for the Fall (and Spring finals..). The rest of your practice will be THE EXAMS. Why is it so hard to sit and do them? Everyone you talk to will tell you they are THE BEST WAY to revise. Yet, you don’t do ‘em because it doesn’t seem fun, you don’t know the law yet. etc.. etc… Guess what, part 2? IT IS FUN!! AND MOTIVATING (you don’t know the law but you will know it soon…). Best plan is to do it when you wake up (before you can talk yourself out of it). How excited was I to do the first three on Saturday – muchly. And the three on Sunday? Wow! Yippee!!! I am super awesome. I indulge my super-awesomeness. There was a bit of ‘hands on hips – but I don’t want to’ initially. Then I just got over it. I psyched myself out. It worked.
2. Bad news, you have PCOS; good news, you have PCOS… Read this. I would argue that all of my 2012 epiphanies are connected to this news.
3. I love law school. I had been questioning it all the time. I have stopped. I am doing it for myself and believe that positive things will follow.
4. I meditate (well, I did three podcasts that are changing how I handle strong feelings in my belly or heart or head). I work on this, presently.
5. We have President Obama for four more years. It was (very) close. But people voted (lots of people) and the majority didn’t listen to the hatefulness promulgated by groups of rich unknowns. It was a moment. Though there are millions of people seemingly afraid by this concept, just cling on to your hopeful nature; perhaps they will change; perhaps not. You voted. That’s neat.
6. I DON’T CARE WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK (finally, Polly got it). I figure it is not about me (kinda arrogant to think it might be about me). Since I have no way of knowing what others have going on in their worlds, I have no way of knowing what they are thinking so why waste any time imagining. I have plenty of other things to keep my brain occupied that are a lot more fun, a lot less stressful, and a lot more productive. I choose that.
7. Since I mentioned #6, I embrace being a PollyAnna (thanks wikipedia) because I care not for those who think me disingenuous. I do see the positive; it ain’t a bad thing for us (you and me year-ago-Polly). We were worrying about this back then, weren’t we Pol. Well,  we no longer care. Speak from the heart, girl and maintain your integrity.
8. I walk around a bit most days, and pull out my cardio kickboxing DVD once a week or so, but that’s it. I have stopped exercising so much in the wee small hours and sleep instead. Actually stress-relieving.
9. I have discovered the ‘secret’ of carb-reduction. In oversize quantities, carbohydrates are not my friend. I haven’t eaten a ginormous bowl of oatmeal for over six months. I eat veggies, beans, and lots of (ideally organic) meats of the world (turkey, chicken…. ham?!). I eat egg whites almost every day. I don’t crave crappy foods. I go to bed and wake up energized. I have finally managed to get past the late-night-carb-attacks because I finally got it – eat crap at night – wake up and feel like crap all day. It isn’t worth it. I decided to stop. I stopped. Once in while, sure; it’s the routine-approach that seems problematic.
10. FYI – you are about to put on fifteen pounds in a short amount of time. This will be awesome in the long run. I would not be feeling this healthy, this in control of my blood sugar were in not for those additional pounds and the subsequent PCOS diagnosis. My diet, my exercise regime and sense of self have changed immeasurably. I feel pretty good despite my looming second year exams. I know it will be fine. The overwhelm can stay hovering just behind me; I don’t want or need it. I can only do what I can do. But I have to choose to do things. So I do. I choose to have fun. I choose to giggle. I choose to study when I can. I choose to work at work. I choose sleep. I choose cardio kickboxing once or twice a week (or month). I have powered down and I feel terrific.
11. No period yet. But it will happen. I know it because I am working to reduce the androgens in my blood stream via lower carb intake on a permanent basis, some exercise here and there, and a zen-like focus.

Oh. One more thing, Polly of 2011, you are about to get the flu but even that experience will turn out to be awesome (read this- #4).

Cheers!
Polly of 2012.

straighthairsgooffacescoop
having straightened her hair for turkey-day,
polly marveled at the accomplishment

While being mindful of the recent U.S. national holiday, Polly wanted to segue back from election-ness to health, law school, and stuff.

Enter the conduit of The Hubby with his spontaneous rendition of a Polly-goof-face.

Thanks for sticking with me and being a shescoops reader, shescoops reader(s). Who knows, I might do something crazy and post again tomorrow soon…

Being able to vote is brilliant. I am excited.

Being able to vote for President Obama is brilliant. I am excited about that too.

votingscoop

On a smorgasbord of issues, I believe this election matters deeply. Pick any issue, it’s on my list: the economy (local/state/national/global), healthcare, women’s rights, energy/climate change, social justice, social security, equal protection of the law, supreme court justices, foreign policy, the necessary role of the federal government to protect our inalienable rights and help move the WHOLE country toward a hopeful future. etc. etc.

This was a hard post to write and keep brief (to minimize overt polly-ticking). I feel deeply about so many issues and so many things I have recently seen, read and thought about. I am a hopeful person and I know that I am lucky to participate by voting. I am putting my faith in the process. I am hopeful that truth, sincerity, compassion, and an impetus to keep moving forward will win the day and President Obama will be re-elected.

So. Let’s get these last pre-election days (of nervous Polly wondering “why are folks in the polls still undecided?”) going:

• Since this blog is about health and stuff – neat healthcare tool: http://www.barackobama.com/health-care/tool/
• In case I didn’t make it clear which way I am voting, here are some more clues: http://www.barackobama.com/news/entry/what-obamas-accomplished
• This is also seemingly neat (especially since I am fascinated by knowing endorsements and who has paid the most money to influence passage or rejection of state ballot measures): ballotpedia.org

I welcome comments appreciating how deeply many people feel about the issues (thoughtful discussion being a necessary part of moving forward). However, it behooves me to mention that this is my blog and I have veto power on perceived meanness (as defined by me).

Can’t be there physically? Donate to the Red Cross or sommit, Polly.

OK. Do you take cash? Why, yes, Polly. http://www.redcross.org/charitable-donations

Anyone want to give blood on my behalf? (turns out, I am ineligible for a variety of odd reasons): http://www.redcrossblood.org/donating-blood

I can vouch for the experience. It can be fun: if memory serves, not only might you feel good about doing something to help, you may get a biscuit &/or drink of orange squash for your troubles (US-ers: that would likely be a cookie and an OJ).

sandiloos

meditationloos

Since the kickboxing/door-smashing incident, I have been doing a lot of self-physical-reflection and finally decided to give meditation a whirl. Armed with some interweb-research, a podcast and something comforting (because my meditation guide-voice told me to), I and went to my ‘safe place.’ It was remarkable. I will be repeating.

Why now? It felt like the right time for me. No doubt my recent self-side-lining on the exercise front has been instrumental: not only do I have time to do it, I have time to choose to do it. For those of you out there who are (let’s call ourselves) ‘keen’ exercisers, you will understand what it might mean physically and mentally to stop ALL FORMS of higher-impact exercise for more than a week. For me, it’s been almost a month. I have done some walking but gently, gently. For me, that is ENORMOUS news. Truth is, from age 22-32 I did way too much exercise (and spent way too much time thinking about needing to do way too much exercise). Since Law School, I have powered down somewhat due to time constraints and my back/hip issues. In the last month, I finally decided to turn off the ‘but I have to exercise A LOT at ridiculous intensity in order to stay sane/healthy’ mindset. It feels awesome. Freeing.

My body struggles with stress. Hmmm, I wonder if part of my PCOS-hormone-drama relates to the combo of: 1) sensitive Polly with: 2) self-imposed stress of ‘got to do that exercise;’ and 3) the constant physical stresses of actually DOING the exercise. Don’t know for sure but an understanding of the stress-hormone, Cortisol, is developing.

Hence a current new direction. Heretofore, I am including daily moments of deep breathing with sporadic meditation-podcast-listening. AND, I am taking it physically-easier. Since the carbohydrate realization, I think it is time to add in some mental/emotional/physical health slices (to the PCOS treatment pie).

I like to try things that make me feel better. I feel better. And, yes. So does Booie.

Booie?

(he’s yellow)